My girlfriend is not a U.S. citizen. She’s Brazilian and attends college here on a student visa which expires when she graduates. Before DOMA (the Defense of Marriage Act) was struck down a year ago, I’m not sure we would have been able to stay together in the States and get married.
Now that our rights are the same as opposite-sex couples, the federal government will recognize and honor our union and allow my girlfriend to stay in the country with a marriage visa.
That being said, our marriage still won’t be easy. The struggle towards full equality continues, but today I want to focus on what we’ve gained.
As my girlfriend once said, “I am really thankful for what I have, not for what I don’t have.”
I wrote a poem and wanted to share it with you today. Please share it with anyone who feels overwhelmed by the darkness of this world. Sometimes we get distracted by the negativity around us and we don’t see the good. But God brings light to the darkest places.
Not Focusing on the Lack
We take an evening picnic
under the stars
and ponder the crescent moon
wondering if we will ever be
so bold as that light.
Sometimes two women in love
feel more like new moons,
strangers’ eyes watching us
credit card bills on the desk
silence from our families
and memories of men who touched us.
But we are not focusing on the lack.
We give thanks
for music in the car
for jobs funding our future family
for a pastor preaching for our rights
for a mom insisting “Nobody messes with my girls”
for friends holding us when we could not hold ourselves
for a faith community supporting us without condition
for a country legalizing our union
and for a God providing us with all we need.
So tonight we lay on the damp evening grass,
seeing that sliver of cosmic hope,
that crescent blade
fighting the tenebrous night
as a sign of our impending
over their darkness.
For more of my story, check out my blog about being a bisexual Christian.